DEALING WITH AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOUR. Most people have experienced or witnessed a colleague behaving aggressively at work. It can be upsetting and distressing, especially if you are the target of the aggression. Aggressive behaviour can be. [1] shouting. Swearing. Personal insults and name-calling. Racial or sexual comments. Verbal threats. Posturing and threatening gestures. Abusive communications. Emotional abuse. Sarcasm. Aggressive behaviour can be caused by things like. Frustration. A sense of injustice. Stress. Fatigue. How to handle an aggressive person, NB. this does not include physical violence. If a person is physically violent, remove yourself from the situation and or seek help immediately. One. Keep calm. Aggression is often designed to rattle you. Not rising to the bait is sometimes disarming. Don’t fight fire with fire. Take a deep breath, pause and compose yourself. Walk away if you need more time. Two. Stay professional. Don’t let the person upset you, even if their attacks are personal. Think about why they’re being aggressive. Try to empathise. Three. Reflect their behaviour back at them. They may be unaware they’re being aggressive. Pointing it out may calm them down. You may not realise, but your behaviour feels quite aggressive. You seem really upset about this. I am going to ask you not to shout at me. Four. Be confident. Stay in control and show signs that your resolve is not breaking. Smile. use humour carefully. Five. Listen. The person may actually have a valid point, and it may be their frustration at not being heard that is causing the aggression. Try to filter out the ‘noise’ in what they’re saying and get to the substance. Calmly repeat back what you understand the problem to be. Six. Ask constructive questions. Try to get the person to focus on a solution. How can we fix the problem. What do you think should happen, now. What can we do differently. Seven. Set consequences. If the person still behaves aggressively, let them know what is at stake if they continue. If you keep shouting, I’m going to have to walk away. Please stop being so aggressive, or I’ll have to ask someone else to come in. NB. Avoid saying calm down – this often only makes people worse. Eight. Leave. If nothing else works, walk away. Encourage the other person to go for a walk to clear their head. I’m leaving now we can talk again when you’ve had a chance to calm down. I think it’s best if we take a break and discuss this later. If a person is persistently aggressive, then it’s best to either avoid interacting with them, if possible, or look into your company’s formal procedures for problem behaviour. Speak to your line manager or HR representative if you have one for help and advice.

[1] ‘Dealing with Aggression’ at. https://www.skillsyouneed.com/ps/dealing-with-aggression.html accessed (26 February, 2018.)
Sources
Preston Ni, ‘9 Keys to Handling Hostile and Confrontational People’ at. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/communication-success/201510/9-keys-handling-hostile-and-confrontational-people (18 October 2015.)
Jennifer Twardowski, ‘How to Deal With Aggressive People’ at. https://www.huffingtonpost.com/jennifer-twardowski/how-to-deal-with-aggressi_b_6361376.html (6 December 2017.)

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